How Long?

When does the question of "how long" change? You are all probably thinking that the question doesn't even make sense, but let me give you the background to help clarify. When you are young, you misbehave or make a poor decision and get in trouble, our parents or guardians punish us (or should punish us)...they get to make the decision of how long your punishment is. However, as you get older you make a poor decision or judgment and misbehave in the eyes of society and your fellow peers punish you (that is if your are actually caught and found guilty). Remember that everyone is innocent until proven guilty (however, I actually believe that our society looks at that from a different angle...we can address that in another blog).

When you are young the variables are a little different as is your punishment. You could be given a punishment and the next hour all is well, or next week, or month (depending on how bad you screwed up). When you are an adult, one wrong decision or judgment can be your life. How is it possible that one day or one period of time (whether it be 15 seconds) can really change your life in terms of years. I have been addressing a situation, that I can't seem to grasp the concept of. Do people deserve a second chance without a true punishment? Can they punish themselves everyday or do the courts and society have to hand down an actual sentence for them to truly be punished? They made a poor decision, they have to live everyday with that decision...but honestly, what good does it do to sit and rot in jail (yes, I do believe that a person in jail rots)! When does the victim say, you know what they have suffered enough, lets drop this and all move on? Bad things happen to good people all the time, bad things happen to bad people, people do occasionally have temporary insanity. How else can you describe something as simple people losing their temper. Obviously, no one intentionally explodes, of course robbers do not wake up and say I am going to injure someone today (they might actually say I am going to rob someone, but definitely not injure or kill them). Something goes a rye and they snap and end up injuring someone. Sometimes it is a mistake, sometimes it is an accident and sometimes I think we should let things go. Sweep things under the rug and continue to about their lives.

How long should some one's punishment be? So, I haven't had the easiest last year and half...but I think it has molded me into a different BETTER person then I was 2 years ago. I think that I drive slower, I stop randomly to smell the flowers (literally), I wake up earlier to enjoy a leisurely morning (rather than trying to get that extras 20 minutes of sleep and then run around like a chicken with my head cut off), I live everyday outside of my comfort zone...and I LOVE LIFE! Before I was in a rush to work, to grow up and be a success...I was living to work and not working to live! Someone changed my life and gave me the opportunity to see that I should live life like the 2 minute warning (one of my new favorite sayings). Try different things, live outside my comfort zone and never leave anything for tomorrow. Never put anything off until tomorrow because there is a huge possibility that tomorrow isn't going to come. Yes, the world will go on...but I might not. Instead of punishing the person that changed my life, I have decided to thank him (with the help of my therapist). It isn't everyday that you get the opportunity to see your life flash before your eyes and it isn't everyday that you get the opportunity to hold someone else's future in the palm of your hands. For those of you who know me, know what I have been through, why I up and changed my life without even blinking, why I live life the way I do...and most of you wonder why I don't seek justice. At the end of the day, this person has given me a gift of life. What kind of person would I be if I didn't return the favor?

Its been a challenging month as things actually start to progress, but I am comfortable in my decision that I need to return the favor to the gentleman that opened my eyes. Yeah, he didn't open them in the nicest of ways, but its possible that if they were opened in any other manor that I wouldn't truly take it in and understand it. After all, the people that know my family, know that I had everything at my disposal growing up...but I didn't realize that anyone had it any different. For example, I honestly, thought that people had a Christmas tree up all year long, or they could go get new soccer cleats at the beginning of every season without even blinking an eye...I didn't realize just how lucky I was. I think I realize that now...as I look myself in the mirror and realize how happy I actually am!