Porcelain Cup.

• What a turn of events. So I wake up to reality smacking me on the forehead. Yes, literally smacking right above the eyes. I have never understood investments, banks, or money. I have never desired to be in charge of any of it. If I could get married and find a wife (so to speak) to handle all the marital assets I would be happier than a pig in shit. In all essence I'd like to find a person like my mother to marry or even my sister (the financial Nazi...sorry tumbles, it was typed with a smile). But in all honesty I absolutely hate finances. I have a broker for my stocks that I absolutely love (bills, yes we are actually on a first name basis). However, this week I am not a fan of him. Its okay, I don't think anyone likes their broker this week.

• I never imagined that the stock market crash would really effect me. I have probably asked my father 1000 times, if people just leave their money in their how could it possibly go down? I have never understood his answer, yet it is the same every time. I honestly don't think he gets sick of me asking (at least he never lets on, although at the same point he probably doesn't remember since I haven't asked him in at least a year). Here I thought I was doing a fabulous job of investing. I thought I had it all figured it out, oh how wrong I was! I work in an industry of dirty money (literally dirty money)...no I am not a hooker! However, the money seems to come and go with such ease. I watch people waste the $100 in 20 minutes, it happens to be the same $100 they just made working that day...oh and to make matters worse it is from the same people that say I am not going to make rent this month unless I pick up 3 shifts. Honestly, people...get your shit together and realize that the booze you are buying is a) a waste of money & happiness (after all they never remember how happy they were the next morning, because they look into their wallet and see only a 5 dollar bill) and b) will have no improvement on your current financial status...(yes mom I know that was a run on sentence). However, I digress, the money comes and goes!

• I have had a kick butt year. I have saved money, I have invested dirty money, and I have continued to live a fat life! KK continuously asks what I do to live the life style I lead. Its become an on going joke, we make probably about the same amount of money but shockingly enough she never has any. I pay cash for almost everything, I take weeks off at a time, I supposedly fly all over the country (which is a little true, this year alone I have been to North Carolina, Phoenix, Massachusetts, and Florida). I have also managed to dump funds into the stock market on a regular basis...probably not the smartest idea, but any other year people would say that you have to spend money to make money. Well, I have decided that I now have to just sit tight to make any money...and there is a good chance it will take an incredibly long time! I have been trying to follow in the foot steps for my fiancial nazi sister, I am worlds away from the stablity she has (and I am incredibly jealous) but I keep telling myself, that until I have three incomes and two people it is going to be hard to compete. I am okay with it, I will always land on my feet!

• So here, I sit drinking a cup of coffee in a white porcelain cup, ever so often placing it down on its matching white saucer. I begin to realize that I am officially old! I have had these cups for 3 years, yet I rarely use them. Its like my parents fine china, it gets brought out for special (and I do mean special) occasions. I am a grown up and I might as well start enjoying being a grown up. If that means enjoying the finer things I have then so be it. Yes, it is nice to sit around and drink coffee as if I would be getting served at a 5 star restaurant. It is a rare yet immensely enjoyable to make the coffee as strong as I like it and get refills without waiting on the server to realize my cup is empty, in a white porcelain cup with its matching saucer...oh the finer things :)

• I understand that the logic behind the stock market crash and porcelain cup is a stretch, but I see I the connection without even a glimpse. I have tried to be an adult (financially, independently, intellectually) yet I never saw myself as anything but the 17 year old kid that wants to skip 3rd period to go get a donut. I guess getting smacked in the head with stock market crash isn't such a bad thing after all.

• In short, I have stopped looking at my stocks and started looking at getting a real job again. I have had a few interviews here and there and in short I have turned down as many jobs as I haven't gotten. I said I was waiting for the right job to creep up and bite me, but in doing so I probably missed some great opportunities...simply by over looking them. As for the moment, I am going to enjoy my white porcelain cup and realize that life is pretty fantastic (no matter what my portfolio says).